Once there ‘was a boy, a strange melancoly boy. He wandered very far, very far, over land and sea…’
“Uhm, just wondering, were you planning on singing or telling a Snapped Story?”
That song, it’s so sad!
“Ants can’t cry!”
Says who, Tom Hanks?
That’s in baseball and you’ve gotten terribly off subject. The 1up mushroom??”
Work, work, work. Focus, focus-
“THE POINT.”
Once there was a mutant mushroom, he caught the eye of two violent plumbers. They ate him, stole him and exploited him on a whim on a very vain, needy princess. This mushroom decided to go on strike. After being threatened into being made into a mushroom risotto, he skipped town and hid out in a Holiday Inn. Ensconced in bed with feather pillows beckoning him, he began to relax and then the dreaded noise seeped in through the next room. Do.do.do.do.do.do.do…
I strolled down the lane, watching for obstacles. Scoping the environment like Liam Neeson in Taken, I was watching out for those high-end leather shoes. I as stepped below the building above, I felt peaceful, people far ahead or behind, I stopped a moment to enjoy the sun’s rays bounce off my exoskeleton.
A bird pooped on me.
My peace was covered, literally. That’s when I changed my view.
This has been another Snapped Story. Looking for other Snapped Stories? Try the tag. Thought of a story for this picture? Share it below, but keep it short and clean people!
Hello, welcome back to Opinionated Ant.
Hungry? I was so I nagged my Human into making her fresh summer rolls. Before she would let me eat them though we had to make a how-to video. Normally, Bebe the Concert Aficionado would be in her princess apron and lording over the kitchen, but she was excused since she handed in her doctors note. We can’t afford to get sick you know. And neither can you so before you start please wash your hands.
“End of Public Health announcement.”
I was wondering when you’d butt in Human.
Here’s our recipe sans video… if you’d prefer an audio demonstration go here.
Once there was a hungry, desperate insect. Stealthily, she made her way across the lush jungle, all senses fixed upon the brown mountain ahead. If she could just make it to the precipice, her deliverance from starvation would be there waiting for her. Dodging great, clumsy giants she scurried as quick as her many legs could take her until, behold the plate! There before her hungry eyes the delicasies she dreamed of daily. Right before her grasp were cold, crisp pickles. Salty, crunchy chips. Grapes and-
Oh no, a giant grabbed the plate away! How cruel, after traveling so far, dreaming so hard her prize was snatched before she could savor even one bite.
As the ant sadly watched, the giant slowly lowered the plate down into the grass below. “What? She’s leaving the plate there!’ The ant began her trip back down, hoping the picnic would wait for her.
Death cannot stop true love. All it can do is delay it for a while.
“Ahh, how sweet.”
I’m nauseous. You humans got it all wrong. Ants are ruled by a matriarch, keeping the male ants around till the Queen is ready to have more children. They eat, procreate, then die.
Although, my humanoid has outdone herself in posting about Portland, Maine this week, here’s one of our favorite shots while walking Downtown.
“That building makes me think of a ship, plowing through the ocean.”
Or asphalt.
“Or Kevin Kline hanging off the front of a pirate ship.”
Okay you won.
“Oh, I am a Pirate King!!” “Sadly I just spent 30 minutes on YouTube looking for I Am a Pirate King (from the 1983 movie adaption of Pirates of Penzance) but found another of my favorites. Paradox!”
Uhm, human is this a glimpse of the movies you grew up on?
“Yes, isn’t it marvelous!”
Things begin to make more sense. Oh false one, you have deceived me! You ARE crazy!
On our way back from Maine this past Monday naturally my human wished to do some shopping.
“Naturally, you bullied me.”
I like to consider it bargaining. You feed me Starbucks delicacies while you went to the Self-Help section. You should admit by now that I’m no hallucination.
