“Technically, it is Monday night and I haven’t even started packing yet.”

Technically, this is going to be a scheduled post so no one needed to know that but now everyone does so let’s try this again.  We should still be enjoying our Floridian vacation when this little blip pops up on your radar.  Rereading these old posts caused my Human and a few friends more than one minute of merriment so check out these pet peeves.  The first three are a series by everyone but me it seems, I feel left out.

10 things that may one day make me snap

10 More Pet Peeves

Your Pet Peeves

This is an older post but definitely worth a glimpse.
Pet Peeves at the Movies: What’s Yours?

Is this green? No. Did you know I was talking in my best Chris Tucker voice? You would have if you’ve watched The Fifth Element as many times as me.

Since her weekend was already jam packed with activities I’ve decided that her punishment will be two-fold. First, she will have to bring me with her EVERYWHERE she goes. Secondly, she needs to make a video of her first attempt at Kimchi.

That might be punishing all of us, her cooking or her attempt to document it, but I feel it is letting her off easy for not coming here in two weeks! Some posts she still has yet to post that I am anxious to share with you was the big Fung Wah trip to Koreatown. Almost 400 pictures later I have a few favorites. I think I may have her post a few pieces of her forgotten poetry too. Talk about humiliation galore!

What about you? Do you ever get caught up and forgot to post or stare at the screen and whine, “I don’t wanna”?

By Miggslives on Flickr

Lately, we’ve been watching a lot of movies and the romance is going to my poor humanoid’s brain.

“Not true, Eliza. I had a fever.”

She sighs where normally she’d scoff.

“I had a cough.”

And I caught her watching Lifetime movies without coercion more than once.

“It was a mystery.”

Whatever her protests, we had an enlightening conversation of ideal romantic gestures. One is the serenade. Funny, passionate, bad and sweet to be serenaded could be the highlight of a movie. What about in real life?

“Train wreck.”

Admittedly, it might not go as well. But let’s put on the rose-colored glasses and ignore the possibilities of stalkers, screamers and scenes of intense embarrassment.

If a man, or a woman, serenades you, especially in public they are opening themselves up for ridicule, rejection, and are laying their humble heart at your feet.

“Unless they are experienced musicians and/or like being the center of attention.”

Rose-colored glasses, HT. Stop hiding behind that gruff exterior we all know you cried at Treasure Planet.

“Stop bringing that up! Besides it had nothing to do with romance. I got something in my eye.”

Bebe was serenaded with a Billy Joel song at the supermarket. What about you lovely readers? Have you ever been serenaded? What was it like? What did they sing and how it did turn out?

Obviously, my human has never been serenaded. Can we say bitter anyone? HT, if you ever find a man crazy enough to like you-

“Thanks.”

-what would be sweet music to your ears?

“More than Words.”

How Quaint.

“What?! It’s a classic. What about you, eL?”

She’s a Brick house.

While Eliza Leigh is jumping on the keys of my cell phone in the other room, no doubt leaving obnoxious tweets, I’m commandeering her blog yet again to share some more pet peeves with you.  These are unique because they were shared as comments in the post 10 More Pet Peeves.  Maybe one is yours.

Covering all the bases

“Other things that get my goat? Willful ignorance, intolerance, close-mindedness and ladies white dress shoes.”
-Scraps

Annoying habits

“Also, he tends to leave kitchen cabinets open after getting a plate or cup out. I hate it.”
-Rachel

Grocery Store Woes

“I say constantly at the grocery store – I’m patient and I will wait till you’re finished. But then they always hurry out of the way. “
-Melissa

I really like this one. I’ll have to try it sometime.

“And the people who write checks. Can’t they get with the times and ask their bank for a check card? It is literally the same exact way of paying, except its worlds more convenient. I don’t get people who turn down convenience because they’re too stuck in their ways!”
-Lynda

Rude Behavior

“My personal bugaboo is rudeness. I cannot – *cannot* – stand that. I answer the phones at work and I come across all manner of telephone rudeness. Is it the empath in me that causes me to be ultra-polite to others?”
-Lisa

“There is no excuse for it, and it makes me want to bash something over their heads. (Which I think is not so much rude- as violent, so I’m not being hypocritical).”
-SUZROCKS

What a visual.  Violence is sometimes a necessary evil.

Grammar

Mandy can’t stand this grammatical error.
“I could care less,” when it’s actually, “I couldn’t care less.” If a person could care less, that means that actually care a little bit. If you couldn’t care less, that means you totally don’t give a rip! Get it right, people!”

I’m afraid to ask her if I formatted that right!

Food

“Talking with a mouth full irritates me so much it was tough when we were living in China hahaha.”
-Maureen

I hate to cross China off my list…

At the movies

“People who bring babies to an action movie (or any movie really). Every time something blows up, the baby screams. If you can afford to go to the movies, you can afford a babysitter.”
-Clarabela

Nothing like baby screams to kill the atmosphere.

I’m glad to know that I’m not the only one who gets batty over little and not so little annoyances.

I enjoyed sharing my rage inducers so much in my last post, 10 things that may one day make me snap, that I put Eliza Leigh in timeout, the shoe box to be precise, so I could share 10 more pet peeves.

One- Rude people in supermarkets

I’m not talking about the lady four inches shorter cackling and calling me short but the people that push and shove to get to the ice cream. Really, the three rows next to me of vanilla are different than the one in front of me? If you are not literally starving or starring in a post-apocalyptic flick then there is no need.

Two- Talking with food in your mouth

We all do it but when you have a mouth full of escaping food as you incessantly talk or flying as you gesture it makes me want to dodge your messy projectiles while wondering if I’ll have to do the Heimlich maneuver.

Three- Leaving empty containers in the fridge

Whether it is eggs, my leftovers, or my ice cream stash if you eat it all throw away the evidence. That way I won’t get my hopes up and throw a tantrum. Well it would be a smaller tantrum.

Four- Crocodile Tears

You want sympathy, you want forgiveness just don’t offer up fake tears. Yeah, it will make me uncomfortable but only because I’m attempting to restrain an overwhelming desire to slap you upside the head and in my best Chris Tucker voice cry, “What’s wrong with you?”

Five- Repeatedly, purposely mispronouncing

I say many things wrong but if you can’t say something right after the thirtieth time in a row then use a different word. For example, if you can’t pronounce Geum Jan Di then just say the main character in Boys Over Flowers.

Six- Beeping when you’re in the wrong

Just because you’re louder doesn’t mean you’re right.

Seven- Telemarketers that hang up on you

I say no thank you and you hang up! Next time I won’t pick up the phone at all.

Eight- Nagging

We all do this too but at least vary your vocabulary otherwise it becomes a mantra- in a bad way.

Nine- Not replying to my emails

When there is a legitimate question or we’re making plans and you blow me off. Oh wait, is that how people feel when I don’t call them back?

Ten- Constantly interrupting my train of thought

If I say hang on a second and continue to scribble furiously then please stop talking to me. Or at least don’t expect a response.

Looking back at these Pet Peeves posts I realize that Eliza Leigh and I have more in common than I thought. That or she’s brainwashing me.  If you enjoyed my ramblings check out this post, 10 things that are just NOT okay, over at SNOTW.

What about you? Do you have any pet peeves that make you a little crazy? Please share it so I won’t feel so lonely.

As told by human translator while Eliza Leigh is still in a sugar induced coma

I am an easy going person; you’d have to be to put up with a highly opinionated mutant ant like eL. However, there are a few things that slip under my skin and make me hold back my Hulk-like transformation with all my might. Believe me no one wants to see me turn green, rip off my shirt or jump out of a plane.

One… leaving an empty roll on toilet paper holder

You’re asking for a rampaging woman if you leave the rolls empty in the bathroom. I’m not sure which is worse having four full rolls sitting on the counter because you were too busy that you couldn’t multitask and refill the roll while on your throne or leaving an incomplete magazine as an alternative. I hope you didn’t want to finish reading that article on clean eating.

Two… cutting me off and then braking

You’re asking for a death warrant if you make me tap let alone slam on my brakes after you almost cause a ten car pileup because you were in such a rush to go ten miles below the speed limit in front of me.

Three… waking me up in the middle of the afternoon for an asinine reason

If you want to know what time Market Basket closes Google it or use the phone that you are harassing me with and call Customer Service. And if you don’t know what Market Basket is then why would you want to go there in the first place?

Four… Pushing people in line

Do you really think pushing someone into an immovable object is going to get you somewhere? And they call me delusional.

Five… Using your cell phone while being waited on and then making everyone else wait while you finish your uber important conversation

If I wanted to hear about your abysmal love life then I would ask you, but hearing it while the cashier is waiting for you to pay and my ice cream melts is bound to cause me to have little sympathy for you when you cry that your boyfriend called you a selfish shrew. Can I have his number?

Six… talking on your phone in public bathrooms

Another cell phone issue, don’t talk in a public bathroom especially if it is a professional call. I will repeatedly flush the toilet and set off the dryers and then run giggling like a ten year old. Test me, please.

Seven…telling me a story when I say I don’t want to hear it

Seriously, if I say I don’t want to hear in minute detail how that guy on I Shouldn’t Be Alive survived or how that sappy Lifetime movie played out… I mean it.

Eight…being told when I can and can’t cheat while on a diet

If I listened to you then it wouldn’t be cheating now would it? Don’t ever attempt to keep me from a McDonald’s ice cream if I want one.

Nine… being ignored when you’re doing it to annoy me

Don’t engage me in a conversation and then not respond to see how long I can keep my cool. Life is not a game of chicken and I will clobber you (or at least imagine it). If you ask me a question then acknowledge my response.

Finally the Tenth and main reason why I’ll end up in restraints…

Acute sleep deprivation

Any of the other complaints are just pesky pet peeves on their own but coupled with acute sleep deprivation are disasters waiting to happen.

If you think I’m bad multiply this list by 50…

*Photo taken by MinivanNinja on Flickr

Driving on a flat can bend your rim- even if it is only a very, very, very short distance.
All the times I drove for long distances on a very, very, very low tire without a bent rim don’t count

If you have roadside assistance make sure you have the phone, card or whatever it is connected to with you.
Speaking of roadside assistance-ours got lost & told my sister that he wasn’t going to look for us. So make sure you tell them the directions. I guess telling him three times wasn’t enough (okay maybe twice .

“I found this whole post about it on CMcKane’s posterous.”

That is funny, who is this CMcKane and how did they know about our day?

Note from the author: Please don’t tellEliza Leigh or her Humanoid Translator they are not real. End of public service announcement.